Fairytale
by oceancat
Summary: A collection of songfics for the pairing of RoadxAllen/AllenxRoad. OOC-ness and updated when I feel like it. I might update it, I might not.
1. Fairytale

Song: Fairytale – Alexander Rybak

Pairing: RoadxAllen

Timeframe: After the war

Disclaimer: Song and characters; not mine.

Warning: OOC-ness,

A/N: I really love this song! I fell in love with it the very first time I heard it and straight away associated it with AllenxRoad~

You might want to listen to the song while you read it or before you read it so that it has the atmosphere of the song and the lyrics make more sense~

Summary: The war is over and Allen reminiscences of a time long ago, when everything was perfect.

* * *

_Years ago, when I was younger,  
I kinda liked a girl I knew.  
She was mine and we were sweethearts;  
That was then, but then it's true._

The war was over. They had won. The Earl had been defeated, and the Noah had scattered after losing their Noah powers. The Exorcists were no longer needed and a tremendous amount of money had been dealt between them.

The Black Order was rapidly losing its residents, some returning home to relatives, some going on to the next adventure and others wandering wherever their feet would take them. Every person was glad that the battle had finally ended and that there was no more need for sacrifices. Everyone was happy and all was good.

But Allen felt that there was something missing. And that's when he remembered a memory from a long time ago, when everything was so much more simple. Back when he was just a small naïve boy. It was the memory of a girl.

_I'm in love with a fairytale  
Even though it hurts.  
'Cause I don't care if I lose my mind  
I'm already cursed._

He remembered her sugary sweet smile. Her bouncing step as she ran down the street, her shoes clacking on the cobblestones. That mischievous sparkle in her eye when she was planning something. The playful winks and stolen kisses.

But she also had a bad point. Over anything else, she had craved blood. As much as it had horrified him, he couldn't forget their first meeting. She would surely have been the death of him. Lucky for him, love overpowered her lust for blood.

She tried hard to change for him and act more human. They were the perfect couple and must have been called cute multiple times by people out on the streets. They'd walk hand in hand and look for a candy store since they both loved sweets. Everything seemed perfect and Allen would have given anything if he could only make his fairytale last longer and escape reality with her.

_  
Every day we started fighting,  
Every night we fell in love.  
No one else could make me sadder,  
But no one else could lift me high above._

Unfortunately, they were on wrong sides of the war. Their relationship was forbidden, and above all, dangerous. They could have both been called traitors. Allen had warned her many times and talked of breaking up, but she would have none of it. Allen was scared for both of them, but if he were to admit it, he didn't want to lose her either.

_  
I don't know what I was doing  
when suddenly we fell apart.  
Nowadays I cannot find her,  
But when I do we'll get a brand new start._

Allen didn't know what had gone wrong. He didn't know why, but all of a sudden, she had left him. He couldn't find her anywhere. She just disappeared, leaving Allen confused and heartbroken. Now that the war was over and there was nothing stopping them anymore, Allen hoped that they could start over.

_I'm in love with a fairytale  
Even though it hurts.  
'Cause I don't care if I lose my mind  
I'm already cursed._

Allen was thinking of looking for her now that he had so much time on his hands. But then again, he knew that if she wanted to find him she'd do it herself. She always did. What would he do if he found her? What if she didn't love him anymore, what if she was with someone else? Allen wouldn't be able to live through that.

Since Allen had nowhere to go and no relatives that he knew of, he decided to work in a circus again like he used to. The circus reminded him of Mana. It was like the ghost of a family. He still remembered his tricks from his time as a performer. It was something that came as naturally as controlling his anti-akuma weapon. A talent he'd been born with. So he set off to London to find a circus that wouldn't mind adding him into their act.

_She's a fairytale, Yeaaah !  
Even though it hurts.  
'Cause I don't care if I lose my mind  
I'm already cursed._

They were performing in a small town in Germany. He'd been here on a mission once. This was their last day and tomorrow they would leave for a new place to perform. He was juggling, concentrating on the brightly coloured spheres, when he heard someone approaching him, shoes clacking on the cobblestones. He looked up to see a girl. Sugary sweet lips smiled at him and beautiful blue eyes sparkled with mischief.

"Where can I buy a ticket for tonight's show, _Allen-kun~"._


	2. Ordinary Day

Song: Ordinary Day – Vanessa Carlton

Pairing: RoadxAllen

Timeframe: Before Rewinding Town to after Rewinding Town

Disclaimer: Song and characters; not mine.

Warning: VERY out of character Road and sort of darkish in some places…

A/N: I'm putting my songfics together. This is actually my first songfic so correct me if I'm wrong ;)

You might want to listen to the song while you read it or before you read it so that it has the atmosphere of the song and the lyrics make more sense~

Summary: Before Road meets Allen in real life, she stumbles upon his dreams not knowing who he is but being pulled to him all the same.

* * *

_Just a day,  
Just an ordinary day.  
Just trying to get by.  
Just a boy,  
Just an ordinary boy.  
But he was looking to the sky._

Road was walking around aimlessly through her dream world as usual. She'd seen many human dreams and each was no different to the one before that. Fame. Fortune. Greed. She hated this greed that humans had, this desire for material gain. It made her sick. It drove her to kill every last one of them.

That day, she had stumbled upon a new territory she had never been to before. From first look, it was no different to all the other millions of dreams. It had a landscape just like any other dream. But the boy that dwelled there didn't dream of money and nor was he greedy. All he wanted was to protect those close to him.

_And as he asked if I would come along  
I started to realize  
That every day he finds  
Just what he's looking for,  
Like a shooting star he shines._

The boy turned to Road and looked at her with curious grey eyes. His eyes mirrored his smile as he called Road over, not minding who she was or that her heart was filled with sin. In that instant, Road knew that this pure boy could cleanse even her black heart; in that instant, she knew she was in love with an angel.

_He said take my hand,  
Live while you can  
Don't you see your dreams are right in the palm of your hand_

The boy offered the girl his hand and when she took it, he proceeded to show her around his dreams. Of his beliefs, sorrows and joys. Road found herself mesmerized. She cried when he was sad and laughed when he recalled happiness. It was like no other she dream she had seen before.

_And as he spoke, he spoke ordinary words  
Although they did not feel  
For I felt what I had not felt before  
And you'd swear those words could heal._

Road had never felt so attached to a mortal. Road wondered what made this boy so special. Why wasn't he corrupted like all those other pitiful humans? Why didn't he waste his life seeking treasures like all the other foolish humans? Road decided to ask. The boy's answer was so simple that it shocked Road.

"My friends are the best treasure I could ask for. I live to protect those close to me."

_And as I looked up into those eyes  
His vision borrows mine.  
And I know he's no stranger,  
For I feel I've held him for all of time._

All of a sudden, Road's whole perspective changed. When she looked up into those silver eyes she forgot all her hatred and anger towards the human race. For all of a few moments she felt like she knew what the white boy meant. In those few moments she forgot all the greed and evil of the world.

_And he said take my hand,  
Live while you can  
Don't you see your dreams are right in the palm of your hand  
in the palm of your hand  
_

Walking along, Road realized that they had come back to where she had first seen him. They'd walked across all the way across the plane of the boy's subconscious. So they strolled, still hand in hand to the tree the boy had been sitting under. Road hadn't even noticed it when she first came, being too fascinated by the change of atmosphere. The boy had opened her eyes to a whole new world beyond the dark world that she lived in. Even for just a while, she could look at the world differently and see the beauty that used to hide from her.

_Please come with me,  
See what I see.  
Touch the stars for time will not flee.  
Time will not flee.  
Can you see?_

It was getting dark. The first stars were already starting to appear. Road couldn't help but compare the boy to a fallen star. A shining white light alone in a dark and corrupted world.

It had felt like time had stopped ever since Road entered the boys dreams, but she knew that if night was falling in his dream land, then morning was coming in reality and the boy would wake soon. Road would have to leave quickly or the boy would remember her when he woke. Even though a part of her hoped he would, that was against her rules. She always left before they were close to waking up.

_Just a dream, just an ordinary dream.  
As I wake in bed  
And the boy, that ordinary boy  
Or was it all in my head?_

With regret, Road walked away from the white boy, out of her dream world, back into stained reality. It was hard to believe that somewhere in the dark there was a kindhearted person out there. She almost dismissed him as an illusion she had unknowingly created for herself to escape the darkness. It seemed that such a pure boy existing in this world was too good to be true.

_Did he ask if I would come along  
It all seemed so real.  
But as I looked to the door,  
I saw that boy standing there with a deal._

Road had searched people's dreams to find him again but in was no use. She decided to convince herself that the boy didn't exist and get on with her life. She kept pulling through life, no hope of seeing the boy ever again.

It was another of her missions from the Earl. It helped her get by easier when she had the chance to rid the world of those evil humans. She'd captured two Exorcists; the ones who wanted to protect that evil. She couldn't understand why the Exorcists would want to protect those worthless mortals.

She was feeling so excited about helping the Earl reach his goal of cleansing the world, that she almost didn't notice her shining ray of hope. Black didn't suit his pure heart.

_And he said take my hand,  
Live while you can  
Don't you see your dreams are right in the palm of your hand  
In the palm of your hand  
In the palm of your hand_

It enraged Road that this white boy would support the evils of this world. She was angry at the Black Order for caging her Allen and making him a slave of humanity. She was angry and took it all out on him. She pierced his devil's eye, for such a thing is too black and unholy to belong to such a white child. She destroyed an Akuma's soul right in front of his eyes. She brought him to the edge of death. And he forgave her. Even knowing that she was his enemy, he forgave her.

_Just a day,  
Just an ordinary day.  
Just trying to get by.  
Just a boy,  
Just an ordinary boy.  
But he was looking to the sky._

Road was walking around aimlessly through her dream world as usual. She crossed over to another dream, getting bored of the last one. From first look, it was no different to all the other millions of dreams. It had a landscape just like any other dream. But the boy that dwelled there didn't dream of money and nor was he greedy. All he wanted was to protect those close to him. Road had stumbled upon the white boy again. And he welcomed her into his heart as he always did.


	3. All the things she said

Song: All the things she said – t.A.T.u.

Pairing: AllenxRoad

Timeframe: From Rewinding Town to after the Ark Battle

Disclaimer: Song and characters; not mine.

Warning: angstish…

A/N: Tried to keep it in character this time… This song is so repetitive! Hope it doesn't annoy you too much, haha. I really love tatu. Might write more fics for their songs. All the quotes are from the manga and anime~

Please Read!!: If the song is all in another language, should I write the original lyrics or translate? I just think that the song loses a lot of the original feel if you translate it but if you don't translate it, a lot of people won't know what it means…

You might want to listen to the song while you read it or before you read it so that it has the atmosphere of the song and the lyrics make more sense~

Summary: Memories of Road Camelot have been haunting Allen ever since that day…

* * *

_All the things she said  
All the things she said  
Running through my head  
Running through my head  
Running through my head_

_All the things she said  
All the things she said  
Running through my head  
Running through my head  
All the things she said  
__This is not enough_

"_If I played around with anyone it'd be you."_

"_It's warm isn't it." _

"_You can't kill me."  
_

"_Isn't this what it feels like when a human touches another human?"_

"_I'm Road Camelot."_

"_Weapons can be used by humans to kill other humans, right?"_

"_I'm a human~."_

"_Why are you angry?"_

"_A."_

"_L."_

"_L."_

"_E."_

"_N."_

Memories of Road Camelot have been haunting him ever since that day. The memories run over and over and over again. It's driving him mad and he doesn't even know what it is and how to stop it. It's so confusing that it makes his head spin, just like her voice in his head.

"_You hate me, don't you?"_

"_You're so nice, Allen."_

"_Let's play again, Allen." _

"_You'll end up by yourself one day."_

_I'm in serious shit, I feel totally lost  
If I'm asking for help it's only because  
Being with you has opened my eyes  
Could I ever believe such a perfect surprise?_

Allen doesn't know what to do. He's never had to battle with his own subconscious before and there's no one he knows well enough to ask. But he can't stop the memories from flooding his mind. The memories are taking over. They're convincing his mind to do things he's never thought of before. They're pulling him into a place of his mind that's unknown to him.

_I keep asking myself, wondering how  
I keep closing my eyes but I can't block you out  
Wanna fly to a place where it's just you and me  
Nobody else so we can be free  
Nobody else so we can be free_

He wonders how it happened, this strange phenomenon. Maybe he's been tricked, maybe he's been poisoned. No matter what he does he can't block her out. His head is giving him false pictures, things that haven't happened, and never will, in his lifetime. And yet, he wishes he could believe them.

_All the things she said  
All the things she said  
Running through my head  
Running through my head  
Running through my head  
__  
All the things she said  
All the things she said  
__All the things she said  
__All the things she said  
__All the things she said  
__All the things she said  
__All the things she said_

_All the things she said  
All the things she said  
Running through my head  
Running through my head  
All the things she said  
This is not enough  
This is not enough_

"_A-llen!"_

He never expected to see Road Camelot again. It's been ages since he last saw her. And he was definitely not expecting such a warm welcome.

He reacts like he was trained to, like an exorcist. He reacts the way he should react to the enemy. But still, he doesn't think he could bring himself to attack her, just like that time, ages ago, when they first met. Luckily, he doesn't have to.

"_You're beating up my Allen too much."_

"_I won't give you one, Tyki."_

She's the same as she was back then, mysterious and clever with that deceivingly childish face. For some reason though, he studies her anyway, as if he's never seen her before. When she hugs him, she smells of candy and children's toys.

"_Though I like Allen, my family is also special to me."_

"_This kind of feeling is the same as yours."_

"_But I love him~!"_

Slowly, unintentionally, subconsciously, Allen starts comparing Road Camelot to himself. That's when he realizes that Road has been poisoned by that meeting too. And suddenly he knows what the poison was. And it dawns on him that it's too late now.

"_It'll be all right Allen."_

And now he has even more memories to mess with his mind and drive him out of his head. The latest memories mix with the old.

"_Allen…"_

_And I'm all mixed up, feeling cornered and rushed  
They say it's my fault but I want her so much  
Wanna fly her away where the sun and rain  
Come in over my face, wash away all the shame_

Right after the Ark incident, everything goes wrong. Memories of the 14th are also vying for his thoughts and the Black Order suspects him. Both sides are wary of him. He wishes to escape to a place where no one will judge him. To a place where it's okay to love and to laugh without a care in the world.

_  
When they stop and stare - don't worry me  
'Cause I'm feeling for her what she's feeling for me  
I can try to pretend, I can try to forget  
But it's driving me mad, going out of my head_

If only he could free himself of that dreaded lullaby, all would be fine. He doesn't mind Road appearing in his mind anymore, and he knows, if he told anyone, they would call him crazy, a madman, lock him up for the rest of his days for falling in love with a Noah, but he doesn't care, not anymore. 'Cause he knows that Road would be waiting for him until he comes around.

_All the things she said  
All the things she said  
Running through my head_  
_Running through my head  
Running through my head  
__  
All the things she said  
All the things she said  
Running through my head  
Running through my head  
All the things she said  
This is not enough  
This is not enough  
__  
All the things she said  
All the things she said  
All the things she said  
All the things she said  
All the things she said  
All the things she said  
All the things she said  
All the things she said, she said  
All the things she said  
All the things she said_

"_This kind of feeling is the same as yours."_

"_Soshite, bouya wa nemurinitsuite,"_

"_But I love him~!"_

"_ikizuku haino nakano honoo__."_

The 14th is showing up in his mind more often now. That cursed lullaby covers all other thoughts like a blanket, blocks out all other sounds besides the melody.

"_You'll end up by yourself one day."_

"_hitotsu to, futatsu to,"_

"_It'll be all right Allen."_

Its only rival is only those memories that even Allen couldn't chase out. He is grateful for them, because when he hears that childish voice, he knows that his mind is still his own. He's hoping that the memories of _her_ could help save his mind from the more dangerous ones at the moment.

"_ukabu fukurami, itoshii yokogao"_

"_You're so nice, Allen."_

"_daichini taruru ikusen no yume, yume."_

"_Don't move."_

It gives hope and time to fight the 14th off somehow.

"_Gin no hitomi no yuragu yoruni,"_

"_Though I like Allen, my family is also special to me."__  
_

_Mother looking at me  
Tell me what do you see?  
Yes, I've lost my mind_

_Daddy looking at me  
Will I ever be free?  
Have I crossed the line?_

He wonders what his friends would say. Linali, Lavi and maybe even Kanda. Would they care of his dilemma? Would they try to help or report him to the higher-ups? Would Linali cry for him or would she call him a traitor and avoid him? Would Lavi act like 'Lavi' or like Bookman junior, Allen being just another part of history for him to record. Would Kanda even look at him?

Yes, he's too far gone to help. All he can do now is hope to have control over his own body when he wakes up in the morning.

_All the things she said  
All the things she said  
Running through my head  
Running through my head  
Running through my head  
__  
All the things she said  
All the things she said  
Running through my head  
Running through my head  
All the things she said  
This is not enough  
This is not enough  
__  
All the things she said  
All the things she said  
All the things she said  
All the things she said  
All the things she said_

_All the things she said._

"_Where can I buy a ticket for the 'pumpkin and the witch'?"_

"_Kya-ho~"_

"_We are the Noah clan."_

"_I'm Road Camelot."_

"_But I love him~!"_

"_Allen Walker."_

"_It's warm isn't it."_

"_You're so nice, Allen."_

"_I'm not quite myself at the moment…"_

"_Guess I'm beaten. That's all for now."_

"_I'm a human~"_

"_Shoot."_

"_I'm not the same."_

"_Are you going to kill me?"_

"_It'll be all right Allen."_

"_A-llen~!"_

"_A."_

"_L."_

"_L."_

"_E."_

"_N." _

"_Let's play again, Allen."_

"_Bye."_

_And the checked, heart shaped doors close behind her with a click... _


	4. Not Gonna Get Us

Song: Not Gonna Get us – t.A.T.u.

Pairing: AllenxRoad

Timeframe: Slightly before Thief G, a random mission

Disclaimer: Song and characters; not mine.

Warning: angstish, hinting to mature stuff, sort of sad.

A/N: Another Tatu song. You can think of this as a continuation to All The Things She Said, it's in the same style and what I originally planned, but I sort of went off along the way, because I couldn't make the good ending good so I had to make it a sad ending.

Please Read!!: No one answered my question. If the song is all in another language, should I write the original lyrics or translate? I just think that the song loses a lot of the original feel if you translate it but if you don't translate it, a lot of people won't know what it means…

The lyrics don't match that much so think of them as Allen's plans and thoughts.

You might want to listen to the song while you read it or before you read it so that it has the atmosphere of the song and the lyrics make more sense~

Summary: There are always so many things that can go wrong in a plan.

* * *

_Not gonna get us  
They're not gonna get us  
Not gonna get us  
Not gonna get us  
Not gonna get us  
They're not gonna get us  
They're not gonna get us  
Not gonna get us  
They're not gonna get us  
Not gonna get us!_

It was a simple mission, really. The case had been confirmed. It was a crown that took over the person when they wore it.

Allen is about to return to Head Quarters but since he is the closest, Komui sends him to retrieve the Innocence. There had been no signs of high level Akuma so there is no need for backup. Komui is sure that there will be no complications. One hundred percent.

Allen walks into the giant double doors of the king's dwelling. Outside, the last rays of the sun are vanishing. It's darker inside than outside. It's eerie quiet. He can't see a thing, but a feeling of dread enters him as he sets foot in the significantly vast entrance hall. The floor creaks and shadows look more ominous than usual.

He hears a sound from across the room. He lifts his eyes to see a silhouette closing the door. There's the unmistakable supernatural shine of Innocence in their hand. The person turns around and looks up at him too. A rapidly fading ray of light shines in through the open front doors at just the right angle and lights the shadow's face.

_Starting from here, let's make a promise  
You and me, let's just be honest  
We're gonna run, nothing can stop us  
Even the night that falls all around us_

Allen eyes widen. The heavy footsteps of black boots echo as Allen approaches. The person is frozen in place, waiting, wondering what Allen is up to. He stops right in front of them. He's fed up with this feeling in his chest. So he lets it out, after all these years. The light outside is dying.

_  
Soon there will be laughter and voices  
Beyond the clouds, over the mountains  
We'll run away on roads that are empty  
Lights from the airfield shining above you_

The last ray has disappeared and they're plunged into darkness. He hears the dull clink as the crown falls and rolls away as the hand holding it wraps around him, feels the small hands pulling him closer, her smirk against his lips, taunting. And he doesn't care what happens.

_Nothing can stop us, not now, I love you  
They're not gonna get us,  
they're not gonna get us  
Nothing can stop us, not now, I love you  
They're not gonna get us,  
they're not gonna get us  
They're not gonna get us  
They're not gonna get us, gonna get us, gonna get us..  
They're not gonna get us  
Not gonna get us  
Not gonna get us, gonna get us.  
Not gonna get us  
NOT GONNA GET US, GONNA GET US!  
Get Us, get us..  
Not gonna get us  
Not gonna get us_

The consequences dawn on him much later, when he's back in his inn room, Link outside his door, no Innocence and a missing ribbon, along with a few buttons from his vest and shirt.

What happens now? Is he a traitor? Should he go back? Is that even an option? He truly doesn't know. He's not even sure if he wants to or not. All his friends blur in comparison to her.

It all feels so complicated, even though he knows all the answers. It feels like the only right thing to do is to run, and never look back. The Order has been cautious of him anyway. No one would care if he suddenly disappeared, he tells himself. No one would notice. He'd just travel with her, a drifter, like his Master.

The idea is more appealing than he thought. It plants itself in his head and starts growing, spreading roots, permanent.

He knows one thing for sure though. If he initiates it, there's no way back. But the idea is already there, making its way into his thoughts, convincing him, promising him a future better than the one he's been given. A chance to keep walking along his own path, not a path already made for him. It's a very promising sentiment. Allen holds onto it with all his might. A future with his significant other.

A happier existence; he is sure that many people at the Order would want that. Like Linali had said on his first day: many deliberately went away and never came back. He'll be just another case in the thousands, though he'd never thought this day would come.

_We'll run away, keep everything simple  
Night will come down, our guardian angel  
We rush ahead, the crossroads are empty  
Our spirits rise, they're not gonna get us_

During the ride back to Head Quarters, the rattling sound of the train carriages and Link sitting across from him, a plan forms in his head. He thinks everything out, checks it twice; gathers all the parts in his head like a jigsaw. It fits. His plan is flawless, he's sure of it. One hundred percent.

_My love for you, always forever  
Just you and me, all else is nothing  
Not going back, not going back there  
They don't understand,  
They don't understand us_

She has a special talent, you see. She can go anywhere. Be it this dimension or another. She can travel even through dreams. That is why Allen is studying the ceiling of his bland room as he tries to fall asleep. Because there are a few extra jigsaw parts that he has to confirm, set in place. The picture is ruined if even one of them is missing. And as he falls asleep, he's pretty sure that there wasn't any doubt in the first place. He'll get all his pieces together. The jigsaw will be complete.

_Not gonna get us, gonna get us, gonna get us  
Not gonna get us  
Not gonna get us, gonna get us..  
Not gonna get us  
Nothing can stop us, not now, I love you  
They're not gonna get us,  
they're not gonna get us  
Nothing can stop us, not now, I love you  
They're not gonna get us,  
they're not gonna get us  
They're not gonna get us  
They're not gonna get us, gonna get us  
They're not gonna get us  
Not gonna get us, get us  
Not gonna get us, get us  
Not gonna get us_

It's all set. He's in the town square while his comrades are fighting Akuma. The plan is all set out and Allen is too focused on it to feel guilty. This is where they agreed to meet. There's a clock tower in the town square chiming twelve times.

He's still looking around for glimpse of short dark hair, exaggeratedly fancy clothing, anything. Tim is looking too, forever faithful to its master wherever he goes, whatever he does. Sounds of fighting travel to him from far away. The clock tower's second hand goes around, tick, tock, tick, tock, and Allen watches it.

She's not here. Allen watches the minute hand anxiously tick, tock, tick, tock, and still, she's not here. Tim lands on his head, but Allen doesn't notice. Time goes on; he hears explosions in the distance, and frantic voices calling him. But it's not _the _voice. He just stands there for ages and ages, waiting.

Smoke is rising somewhere in the distance, the explosions are dying down and the wrong voices are getting louder. There's less people about, the night is chasing away the day. And still, he stands and waits, listening to the clock go tick, tock, tick, tock. She's not here. So he waits some more. The day is ending. All sounds are drowned out except for one.

Tick.

Tock.

Tick.

Tock.

He spaces out, for a second draws his eyes way from the clock face, and realization hits. It hits him like a ton of bricks, right in the chest, and topples him over.

He's missing a piece.

_She's not here._


	5. Dream

Song: Dream – Priscilla Ahn

Pairing: RoadxAllen

Timeframe: Before Road turned into a Noah – Around the time when the Earl gets killed?

Disclaimer: Song and characters; not mine.

Warning: AH THE ANGST!!! SOMEONE TURN IT OFF! Out of character Road as usual, character death, one-sided love and emoness…

A/N: Wow, how long's it been since I last decided to upload!? I had so many songs I wanted to do, but none of them came out properly...Well, this one looks okay..? I wonder where all this emo and angst comes from… Must be the songs I choose… Anyway, this has a shot in the dark at Road's past, not much RoadxAllen until almost the end and slightly fluffy... Enjoy?

You might want to listen to the song while you read it or before you read it so that it has the atmosphere of the song and the lyrics make more sense~

Summary: The story of a girl who who dreamed but didn't live to see what she had only dreamt about.

* * *

_I was a little girl  
Alone in my little world  
Who dreamed of a little home for me_

Once upon a time, Road was an ordinary human. She had lived in England, in an orphanage on the edge of a forest.

Road's wish was to someday leave the orphanage. The teachers and caretakers felt uneasy around her. All the kids hated and envied Road. She was obviously special; anyone could see it. The little brats pulled on her piggy-tails and spilt ink in her bed and caregivers nagged her about her antisocial behavior. That's why Road spent most of her time alone, sneaking off to the forest and lying in the tall grass with her eyes closed.

_I played pretend between the trees  
And fed my houseguests bark and leaves  
And laughed in my pretty bed of green_

Time went on and Road grew up but she still retreated to the forest at every chance she had. Her toys were her family and the forest was her home. This was where she played, relaxed and dreamed. It was a universe just for her.

It was only natural for the change to occur here.

_I had a dream  
That I could fly  
From the highest swing  
I had a dream_

No one saw the girl collapse, no one heard her cry out. So, there in the tall grass, Road lay, as the memories of the Noah of Dreams invaded her subconscious. No one realized that the young girl was missing until the next morning.

No one cared.

When the change was complete, she realized what a waste of time her previous life had been. These humans, they didn't know anything! They were pitiful, and she had been pitiful like them too once. She knew better now. Road vowed to herself to never act like a foolish human again. It was degrading and stupid.

_Long walks in the dark  
through woods grown behind the park  
I asked God who I'm supposed to be_

Road had somewhere she belonged now; she was part of the Noah clan. She had a family. When you had everything you needed, you tended to wonder what the point of living was. What was she born to do?

__

The stars smiled down at me  
God answered in silent reverie  
I said a prayer and fell asleep

One day she asked Tyki, the person she felt most close to in her family. She asked him what she should live for. Tyki had said that if she couldn't find something to live for, she should find someone to die for.

__

I had a dream  
That I could fly  
From the highest tree  
I had a dream

To the girl who vowed to avoid human emotions, love was out of the question. And yet, it happened anyway without her consent. It was frustrating and yet it was the best reason she had to live.

She enjoyed the rare occasions when she was able to see him and thought of seeking him out when he wasn't around. His name was Allen, and he was like no other human that Road had ever met before. He had a heart of gold. He was as beautiful as a creature on the earth could get, in Road's opinion. Road wished that he would look at her with a smile too one day, but that was surely never going to happen. As Noah and exorcist, they were officially enemies, no matter what Road felt for him and Road just couldn't overcome the sadist in her that had been born on that fateful day at the orphanage.

It was a hopeless case, but nevertheless, a girl could dream.

So she dreamed and she wished but it never came down to anything.

This was the fate of the Noah clansmen. They were destined to destroy what they loved unless they got destroyed by it first.

When they had first met, he had been just an exorcist; an unfortunate human who was being strung along by other more manipulative humans using him to get what they want. As the day turned to afternoon and the boy woke up, he had proved to be much more than that. When Road left through her door in the early morning the next day, he had revealed himself to be quite interesting. He was kind enough to spare the person who had tried to kill him because it was a human? Road had never seen a more selfless person. When she had reached her room back at the mansion, she was wearing a genuine smile on her face.

_Now I'm old and feeling gray  
I don't know what's left to say  
about this life I'm willing to leave_

Road remembered fondly now, that night in the forest. She had thought that she would die, at the time. The Noah of Dreams recalled asking God for mercy, to let her live that little bit longer. At the moment though, she couldn't think of a better ending.

_I lived it full, I lived it well  
There's many tales I've lived to tell  
I'm ready now, I'm ready now  
I'm ready now_

Road wouldn't mind dying; she wouldn't mind dying for her Allen. That was her destiny. She had to die for the one she loved or she would destroy him one way or another. So she hugged the exorcist one last time, stood back smiling a sad smile and spread her hands before him.

_To fly from the highest wing  
I had a dream  
_

The last thing Road saw was that beautiful, kind smile that only Allen was capable of before her eyes closed and she fell to the floor, her dress tattered and red with blood.

When she hit the floor, she imagined that she was back in her woods and she imagined what would have been if Allen had been there with her, both humans, lying in the tall grass, eyes closed. Road smiled serenely, whispered something softly and passed away.

She never felt the wet and shining tears fall on her still face. She never heard the quiet sobs or saw the shaking form of the one standing above her.

She never found out that Allen had heard her whisper and answered softly, kissing her forehead.


End file.
